A little secret

When people ask you what you want to be when you are a little kid, you give the standard answers such as doctor, lawyer, nurse or teacher. But are those things what you really want to be?

I decided I wanted to be a doctor in high school and this desire continued throughout college. I liked science, especially anatomy and cell biology. It didn't matter that I am not good with needles and cannot picture myself giving someone a shot or that I didn't get a 30 on the MCAT and have a 4.0 GPA in college. I was convinced it was the right path for me until I applied to medical school and didn't get in. Big fat bummer.

Rejection sucks, everyone knows that. Although I was upset about not getting in, I wasn't that upset. I didn't cry myself to sleep for days or stop eating, although I probably should have I might be skinny today if I did that. I was more upset about not knowing what I would be doing after graduating from college. Then I applied to a graduate program at Philadelphia College of Osteopathic Medicine (PCOM) and I got in. I was happy about this and knew I had a plan for after graduation.

Unfortunately, I struggled in this program despite studying all the time and, while I learned a lot, it was most certainly not the program for me. It gave me a taste of what medical school would have been like. Now I am glad I did not get in to medical school because I don't think I would have liked it. I left this program after completing the postgraduate certificate track.

The next semester (January 2011) I started a graduate program at Temple University and I like it so much better. I have only had two classes, but they were interesting and I actually enjoyed them. The only classes I really liked at PCOM were anatomy and neuroscience. So far, this program has been a much better fit. Although, now I am preparing to take the GRE (Graduate Record Exam) the first week of June so I can officially be part of the program.

Although I am not sure exactly of what I want to do, I know I am better off now then I was before. My little secret is that I sort of have no idea what I want to do anymore. I do have some idea of where I would like to fit in in the pharmaceutical industry (auditing, clinical trials, drug development). It's just a question of if I will be able to get those jobs or not. Ultimately, I would really like to move to L.A. and become a movie/TV show extra or live abroad for a year and teach English. Working for one of my favorite magazines or being a fashion stylist to the stars would be pretty cool. I think the best job ever would be a journalist job covering different celebrities for E! and the different award shows like the Grammies, Academy Awards or Golden Globes.

However, none of these jobs seem to be realistic for me. So I guess I will just have to finish my Master's degree and get some really cool pharmaceutical job.